Eton Mess, three different versions.

Eton Mess is an amazing Summer treat. Simple and tasty, it can be made from scratch with a bit of elbow grease and a few hours spare, or put together from store-bought ingredients. You can take it up a notch with great additions such as Cranachan for the cream or flavoured meringues, or you can cut the calories with yoghurt and more fresh fruit. Here are three versions to try out for your next picnic or pudding!

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Decadent Version.

This is closest to the one we made, except, being alco-free as I am right now, we skipped the whiskey/Baileys/brandy.

Ingredients.

  • 500g strawberries
  • 4 egg whites
  • 300ml double cream
  • 215g plain sugar
  • 115g icing sugar
  • a shot of whiskey, Irish cream or brandy
  • a few drops of vanilla extract

Utensils.

  • chopping board and knife
  • two mixing bowls
  • baking tray with greaseproof paper
  • whisk (use a hand whisk for a good arm workout!]
  • a bowl for assembly

Recipe.

  1. Preheat the oven to 110C.
  2. In one bowl, whisk the egg whites until they are fluffy and stand in floppy or firm peaks.
  3. Add 115g of the white sugar slowly and steadily, a tablespoon at a time. Keep whisking a bit in between.
  4. Add the icing sugar a quarter at a time. Keep whisking in between.
  5. Whisk until a batter forms.
  6. Put on the baking tray and in the oven. Set a timer for 1h 30min to 2h.
  7. In the next bowl, start whisking the double cream with the last 100g of white sugar.
  8. Once thick, add the alcohol and vanilla and whisk until thick again.
  9. Thinly slice the strawberries.
  10. Wait until ther meringues are golden brown, remove from oven.
  11. In the bowl, layer meringue, cream and strawberries.

Low-cal Version.

Delicious and very low calorie compared to the usual one!

Ingredients.

  • 800g strawberries
  • 2 egg whites
  • 20og greek yoghurt sweetened with honey
  • 170g icing sugar

Utensils.

  • chopping board and knife
  • one mixing bowl
  • baking tray with greaseproof paper
  • whisk (use a hand whisk for a good arm workout!]
  • a bowl for assembly

Recipe.

  1. Preheat the oven to 110C.
  2. In one bowl, whisk the egg whites until they are fluffy and stand in floppy or firm peaks.
  3. Add the icing sugar a quarter at a time. Keep whisking in between.
  4. Whisk until a batter forms.
  5. Put on the baking tray and in the oven. Set a timer for 1h 30min to 2h.
  6. Thinly slice the strawberries.
  7. Wait until ther meringues are golden brown, remove from oven.
  8. In the bowl, layer yoghurt and strawberries.
  9. Sprinkle meringue on top.

Store-bought Version.

A quicker and simpler way of getting things done.

Ingredients.

  • 500g strawberries
  • 3 meringues
  • 300ml cream or yoghurt

Utensils.

  • chopping board and knife
  • a bowl for assembly

Recipe.

  1. Slice the straberries.
  2. Layer or mix strawberries and cream or yoghurt in a bowl.
  3. Sprinkle meringue on top.

And that’s how to make three different types of sweetly Summery Eton Mess!

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What’s your favourite Summer pudding?

 

For help starting out homemaking, check out The ESSENTIAL Beginner Homemaker’s Guide. For help budgeting all your everday and not-so-everyday essentials, from food to transport to clothes, check out On A Budget: The good homemaker’s guide to economizing.
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7 Steps to Dealing With Yourself In Relationships.

Following an article and a response a while back, I decided to construct my own reply.

Biblical Gender Roles began with “7 Steps to Dealing with a Lazy Wife”.

7 Steps to dealing with a lazy wife
Step 1 – Know beforehand that this will hurt her

“Faithful are the wounds of a friend; but the kisses of an enemy are deceitful.” – Proverbs 27:6 (KJV)

Very few women if any will take it well when their husband tells them he believes they have been lazy and neglectful in their duties to their home. But it must be said.  This is the sacrifice of discipline that you must make as a husband.
Step 2 – Speak the truth in love

“14 That we henceforth be no more children, tossed to and fro, and carried about with every wind of doctrine, by the sleight of men, and cunning craftiness, whereby they lie in wait to deceive;

15 But speaking the truth in love, may grow up into him in all things, which is the head, even Christ:” – Ephesians 4:14-15 (KJV)

The “L” word is not a swear word. In some Christian circles a man saying his wife is acting “lazy” is akin to him calling her a cuss word.  The KJV uses two words for laziness – one is “slothfulness” and the other is “idleness”:

“By much slothfulness the building decayeth; and through idleness of the hands the house droppeth through.” – Ecclesiastes 10:18 (KJV)

So yes speak the truth in love – but speak the truth.  If it walks like a duck and acts likes duck – it’s a duck. In fact the Bible says that a godly wife is NOT a lazy wife:

“She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness.” – Proverbs 31:27 (KJV)

There is no sugar coating this gentlemen – if a wife is not keeping up with duties of her household she is being lazy and she must be called out on this.
I think that initially you should try and handle this in private with your wife away from your children and with most other issues.  But at a future point if she continues in this sin of laziness it will become evident to the children that mom is doing something wrong.  I will talk about this more later.
Step 3 – Make the consequences for her laziness clear

“As many as I love, I rebuke and chasten: be zealous therefore, and repent.” – Revelation 3:19 (KJV)

At first give her a warning. But let her know that if you come home and see the house is a mess, laundry is not done, the home is not clean or dinners are not being prepared there will be consequences for her laziness.
I have talked in more detail about how men can discipline their wives in my post “7 Ways to Discipline your wife”.
Step 4 – Follow through on disciplinary consequences if she fails to change her ways

“Now no chastening for the present seemeth to be joyous, but grievous: nevertheless afterward it yieldeth the peaceable fruit of righteousness unto them which are exercised thereby.” – Hebrews 12:11 (KJV)

If you thought confronting your wife about her laziness was the hardest part you would be wrong.  Following through on the consequences you promised will be the most difficult part.  But remember why Christ sacrificed himself? It was to make his bride holy and so to you must do this to try and yield the fruit of righteousness in your wife’s life.
Step 5 – Attempt private discipline first
Once you have examined “7 Ways to Discipline your wife” you will notice that most of these methods could be instituted in a way that does not draw attention to your wife from your children.  I would suggest you try these kinds of private discipline first.
One method of private discipline that I added as an update to “7 Ways to Discipline your wife” is using your time as a husband as a method of discipline.  This is especially important to men in Tom’s situation where finances are tight. Many women value their husband’s time more than almost anything else.  A man can use discretion with how much of his free time that he allocates to his wife as one method of discipline.
Step 6- Move to more public discipline if private discipline does not work
An example of public discipline would be turning off the internet or cable in your home. Perhaps you might lock these things out with a code only you know. If you need the internet for work or children need it for school you could put the new code only in your computer and theirs and not your wives so she will have no access while others can still use it.  If you have to do this to shake your wife from her laziness this will get the attention of your children as it affects them.
Contrary to what some Christian teachers may teach – you do not have shield your children from your correction and discipline of your wife especially if she puts you in the position to have to do things that are more publicly visible to the rest of the family.
Some might say that this type of discipline undermines a mother’s authority in the eyes of her children and dishonors her before them in direct contradiction to I Peter 3:7’s admonition for men to honor their wives. But this could not be further from the truth.
The mother has dishonored herself by placing her husband in the position to have to elevate his discipline of her from private to public. Matthew 18:15-17 teaches us this principle that first correction is to be attempted privately but if the person remains in unrepentance their sin is to be made public.  Wives and mothers are not an exception to principle.
Step 7 – If she spurns your discipline then bring her before the Church

“…How have I hated instruction, and my heart despised reproof;” Proverbs 5:12 (KJV)

An now we come to the most public form of discipline a man might have to bring against his wife.
As husbands we have a duty to discipline our wives for sinful behavior. But whether it comes to our wives or our children there is only so much that we can do to discipline them and try and get them on the right path. If they despise our discipline and rebel then we must leave them in the Lord’s hands.
It is only when we have exhausted what we can do and if they continue in steadfast rebellion against our attempts to discipline them that we then should bring them before the church (Matthew 18:15-17).
But again they may not even listen to the church.
We must face the fact that discipline does not always yield the results that we want for those we love that are under our authority and spiritual care. But discipline requires two active parties for it to be successful. It requires the authority to perform the discipline and it requires the one under authority to learn from the discipline and change their way.
However, even if the wife does not learn from the discipline and change her ways this does not mean removing the disciplinary measures.  Once all measures have been taken those measures should stay in place until repentance is made.

VioletWisp then followed up with “7 Steps to dealing with a Sexist Partner”:

1. Insist from the start of a relationship that everything is split equally, don’t fall for nonsense notions of men choosing, paying or opening doors.
2. Once co-habiting, ensure household chores are evenly split, so outdated roles aren’t assumed without thought, and the joy of maintaining a well-kept, shared space is appreciated fully by all.
3. Always stay in some form of employment if possible, or at least keep skills up to date, so that a finance card can never be used against you.
4. Let sex fall within a natural rhythm when both of you want it. Never feel the need to go at it for the sake fulfilling an unwritten quota, and risk it becoming something you don’t look forward to.
5. If your partner ever mentions disciplining you, as if you are a child and he is a terrible parent from previous centuries, run a mile.
6. If your partner ever suggests that the egalitarian teachings of the character Jesus can be used to force you to submit to him, tell him you’re joining the Quakers and kick him out.
7. If your partner suggests you are lazy, get pens and paper out and each write down all the shortcomings you see in each other and discuss if either of you are willing or able to change. If you can’t come to agreement and feel the shortcomings are a deal breaker, go your separate ways.

My own reply was a comment at Violet Wisp’s page, but I felt it might be a breath of fresh air among so much… confrontation.

Seven steps to dealing with a relationship as adults:

1. Observe your capabilities from the start of the relationship and give freely and happily. Do not expect returns on investment other than when you invest love and do not keep score. You know, as though you love them.

2. Once co-habiting, ensure all household chores are DONE, whoever the hell does them. Who cares if you slip into traditional or nontraditional gender roles, the dishes need washing.

3. Stay busy earning or saving, but try and get one of you to work part time or from home, just so someone’s there for money saving tasks, animals, children and general conveniences. Plus, being at home all day is a luxury that the recipient will not leave unappreciated.

4. Talk about sex openly and honestly. Have sex when you both want to. Agree to masturbate or compensate sexually for each other when you’re not quite in the mood for proper intercourse. Hangups and frustration suck.

5. If your partner ever mentions disciplining you, first see if you are being unbearable in your demands or denials. There are very few people who will even threaten discipline without feeling sorely hurt. If they are not hurt, you’re dating a nonempath.

6. Work constantly to move towards a better future as a couple, rather than worry about who is or is not in charge. Disagreements are fine. Final decisions can be made by anyone. But when the argument is one vs the other, it will end in disaster.

7. If your partner finds shortcomings in you, talk about them and see if you can see the same issues and whether they bother you. If they do, change them. If they do not, offer your partner an out. Bringing up lists of negatives about each other, mulling them over and going on about them all the time is a great way to stop loving someone. Slight idealizing results in longer, happier relationships. Besides, what sort of a person are you if you can only bring up problems as a response to someone else’s complaints? Why not deal with every problem as they arrive?

Because there is no formula, Biblical, feminist or otherwise, that will make your relationship work, that will get you the “results” you want out of the independent agent that is your partner, that will make everything awesome all the time. There is only the two of you and your own agency. Your partner is not a puzzle piece in your life, nor a project. Cut loose and work on yourself and your relationship. There is only so much you can control.

TTFN and Happy Hunting!

 

For help starting out homemaking, check out The ESSENTIAL Beginner Homemaker’s Guide. For help budgeting all your everday and not-so-everyday essentials, from food to transport to clothes, check out On A Budget: The good homemaker’s guide to economizing.

Making your own nut and seed butters!

We all want to eat a bit healthier. And we all seem to love peanut butter! We’ve probably devoured it by the tub from the age of one, so it’s hardly surprising. Of course, the first thing any healthy eating fanatic discovers is that peanut butter is actually awesome for you, albeit calorie laden, just as long as we eat the all peanut, low sugar, low salt variety. Some people are happy at that point, but some of us psychos then start to look for different nut butters: almond butter, sesame paste, cashew butter… And I’m sure that you, like I, have noticed that these special nut and seed butters are expensive. Well fear not! You can actually make all your nut butters very cheaply at home and so quickly, even the traditional way, you will never go back!

Ingredients:

  • 1 cup nuts or seeds of choice
  • 2tbsp equivalent oil
  • a pinch of salt

Utensils:

  • bowl
  • meat grinder and blender, or a food processor

Recipe:

  1. Soak your nuts or seeds in boiling water, leave overnight.
  2. Drain them.
  3. Roughly chop or mince the soaked nuts.
  4. Add the oil and salt.
  5. Blend until a paste forms.
  6. Serve.

Is it really that simple? Yep!

TTFN and Happy Hunting!

 

For help starting out homemaking, check out The ESSENTIAL Beginner Homemaker’s Guide. For help budgeting all your everday and not-so-everyday essentials, from food to transport to clothes, check out On A Budget: The good homemaker’s guide to economizing.

How (And Why) To… exfoliate Roman style.

Warning: this post contains grossness. Gross picture. Gross. You have been warned.

Exfoliation is a common practice and for good reason. Between skin oils, dirt and grime from outside, makeup and other assorted elements, our skin often has a greasy film over it that sticks dead skin cells, dust and dirt to our bodies. Exfoliation gently removes this whilst stimulating the healthy skin to keep our pores clean and our natural barriers strong. All in all, exfoliation can improve our skin health, produce a radiant glow, eliminate dirt and discourage acne and black heads.

Which is why I’m surprised that we only use gritty exfoliants, like sand, sugar, salt or walnut shells, to clean our skin.

You see, a good part of exfoliation is scraping. And when we use a gritty rub, we aren’t really scraping all our skin. Sure, we think soap will “get it”, but the reality is quite different.

For illustration purposes, this is my two day unexfoliated face.

Roman Exfoliation How To

Bear in mind that the above picture is older as I forgot to take that day’s “before”, so my face is a bit plumper. However the complexion is a perfect illustration of my usual skin health a few days without exfoliating.

This face is washed once or twice daily with a bit of soapy water and when I wear makeup I use baby wipes to remove it before the end of the day, missing only a bit of eyeliner each time. So how much grime could be on this face?

How about this much grime?

Roman Exfoliation How To

Normally I would use a soap or a natural oil to lift it more easily, but specially for you guys, this is just the oils and sediments that build up on my face when I don’t do deep exfoliation.

That is a lot of grime, right?

Yet this is how my face looks literally minutes after a Roman exfoliation, which removes all that nasty buildup:

Roman Exfoliation How To

And that is why we need to try and learn to exfoliate, Roman style.

1: The oils.

The first step to Roman exfoliation is something we all would rather avoid putting on our skin: oil. But like dissolves like and as the thing that is gluing all this gunk to our skin is oil, using an oil to dissolve it is only natural. Pick a soft oil like olive oil or coconut oil and apply a thin coat, just enough to get a little foam, over the body part you want to exfoliate.

Start under a warm shower, to open the pores. Step away from the stream. Rub in the oil nice and gently until it’s warm and a bit foamy. Let it sink and rub it again before moving on to scraping.

Ancestral origin: The Romans did this with olive oil!

2: The scraper.

Here anything that is firm but a bit soft will do. The scrapers you get with hair removal gels work great for large body parts, as does plastic cutlery, but for face and neck I much prefer just to use my nails. Pick something that scrapes off the oil, but doesn’t irritate your skin much.

Then, drag it over your skin, rinsing after each stroke. You want to lift off the oil and then wash it away, along with the grime it’s loosened. Press down firmly on spot and blackhead prone areas to empty and cleanse the pores and squeeze out any excess oils.

Ancestral origin: The Romans used a copper scythe-shaped scraper and were often assisted by servants!

3: The rinse.

Once you’re all scraped, wash yourself down in warm water. If your skin is dry or healthy you may want to use a bit of soap just to take away the remaining oil. But if your skin is very oily you don’t want to dry it too much, or your body’s natural oil production could be messed up even more. Just be patient and let the water do most of the work.

Once you no longer feel any oil on your skin, turn the water temperature as cold as you can stand it and wash yourself in it, to close the pores and tighten the skin.

Ancestral origin: The Romans loved nothing better than a cool dip after a good wash!

4: Drying.

Were possible, air dry your skin. Any extra rubbing or stimulation could worsen any slight abrasions and encourage your skin to produce more oil defensively.

If you can’t air dry, at least just pat gently with a very soft, nicely clean towel.

5: Frequency.

I don’t recommend doing this more than every other day. Scraping causes slight abrasions on the skin and, even though they won’t bleed or hurt, they can build up over time. A day is all it should take to recover, but a 48 hour cycle gives you safer parameters.

But don’t worry! Even though my skin is quite pink in that post-shower picture, this is how I look a mere four hours later:

Roman Exfoliation How To

It isn’t dangerous. It’s very healthy and good for your skin. Just be careful with it, is all.

After all, most Romans didn’t shower or wash every day and you can definitely have too much of a good thing!

TTFN and Happy Hunting!

Embrace Your Inner Tomboy to Be More Feminine?

Often in the West we tend to think of tomboys and feminine as a dichotomy. Either you’re a tomboy or a girly-girl. Whether you’re a child or an adult, those are your choices. If you’re lucky you can be “tomboyish” or “girlish”, rather than in one camp or another, but generally you’re stuck with those choices. Especially so in modern Western countries, but even in old Spanish texts do we find girls being called “Marimacho” (male Mary) and in Japan they call a less delicate girl “otemba” (from the Dutch for “untameable”). Whatever they used to mean and whoever they used to be assigned to, as Americanization advances, slowly these terms come to mean any woman who isn’t girly enough. Either you are feminine and virtuous or butch and unruly.

However, as I explored in “Should Femininity be a Primary Duty?“, femininity isn’t quite that simple. On the one hand, there does seem to be a form of pure Western femininity.

So femininity, in terms of dress, is “somewhere between pretty and beautiful”. I’d say that summary applies to most other aspects of femininity also. Not girlish, but not boyish. Mature, but not sexy. Well-kept, but not overdone. Attractive, delicate, coquette, coy, friendly, open, reserved and polite. Somewhere between a girl and a woman, miles away from a whore or a man.

I’d say that makes good sense, wouldn’t you?

When we look at images of conventionally feminine women, we see skirts and dresses from just above the knee downwards, maybe slightly higher if it’s obviously warm or she’s on a beach. We see long, well-groomed hair and long-ish, well-groomed nails. We see a splash of make-up; not attention-seeking, but pleasing to the eye. We see women who stand with their backs straight and their shoulders back, their chins not too high in the air, their hips and busts not tilted alluringly, no slouch; just a graceful, unabashed, non aggressive woman. We see women who write, who sew, who clean, who care, who cook and talk. We see mothers, secretaries, teachers, nurses and cooks. Examples abound in the pictures I have inserted between these paragraphs. That is what feminine looks like. That is what feminine is. If you seek to be purely, wholly feminine, be everything described, everything portrayed and nothing else.

But this femininity, whilst superficially perfect, is still incomplete. If you strive to be feminine, then you need to also strive for more. A porcelain doll, a Disney princess or a Stepford wife is perfectly feminine. But that sort of femininity is also empty. Porcelain dolls are fragile and purposeless, Disney princesses are infantile, Stepford wives are inhuman and loveless. Which is where the tomboy comes in. You see, tomboys are not, as is often and increasingly assumed, gender-challenging, masculine girl-beasts. A tomboy can be anything from butch to just a girl who’s a little rough around the edges, and the latter is more common than the former. Tomboys are still part of the spectrum of femininity and whilst a butch or masculine girl could learn a lot from porcelain dolls and princesses, princesses could also learn a lot from tomboys.

So what are the benefits of being a tomboy?

Well, the first one is physical and mental resilience. Tomboys grew up falling out of trees, almost drowning, getting bitten by animals and other children, being shoved around by larger, stronger boys, practicing martial arts. Tomboys grew up being called ugly or butch, being insulted for neglecting fashion and celebrity drama, being teased and sworn at by the boys they spent the day with. Everyone eventually builds up some resilience to life as they grow up, but a tomboy specifically builds up that physical toughness, pain endurance, internal fortitude and emotional coolness that so many dramatic princesses could use once in a while.

Secondly, all this rough and tumble has an effect on your body. If you love looking good, having curves and leanness and good skin and lustrous hair, then you may be surprised to know that under the dungarees, dusty hair and makeup-less face, the tomboy has it in spades. Humans are meant to be physically active. Otherwise in the wild we would starve or be eaten, die of cold or drown. We need endurance, muscle and lightness. So it’s not really surprising that the sort of figure we find most attractive in a woman, be we male or female, straight or gay, is a lean one with a bit of muscle for shape and a bit of fat for health. To boot, keeping active and healthy encourages the rest of your body to follow suit, leading to clearer skin, better hair and nails and brighter eyes. In short, playing football, going hiking, gardening or lifting weights is making tomboys primally sexy.

And you best start lifting weights, playing sports, taking apart engines or climbing trees, because all this love of or indifference to mess is beneficial in and of itself. If you plan to be kept by a man, then you need to add something more to the table than what he can get from a doll. If you plan to keep yourself, then you need to be ready to keep your own home and pull your weight at work. Whatever you do, some strength in the face of mud, rain, bleach, drool, dust, paint, oven cleaner, polish, ink, etc will improve your ability to be a functional human being.

And whether you plan on being kept by a man, keeping men, dating men, being one of the guys or just surviving work, some ability to relate also helps. Whilst not everyone fits into their designated “camp Mars” or “camp Venus”, some stereotypes are there because people are clichés. Most men like some sort of sport, either watching, playing or discussing. Most women have a vague idea of some sort of sport and know more athletes’ names than they do rules to any given sport. Most men keep clean and tidy and minimalist. Most women dress up and load down with makeup, jewels, house decoration and accessories. Whilst a tomboy could still dress like a woman and learn the names of famous athletes by heart, the formative years she spent around boys have given her a healthy appreciation for the things that most men like and a deeper understanding of male conversation. The tomboy can discuss the latest scores, throw some insults around, receive some insults with good grace and stay friendly or intimate with a man in a way the princesses can’t even understand.

Finally, where a tomboy’s character can often be too brash, loud or generally rude to attract many romantic partners, when used carefully it can be a lifesaver in everyday situations. Being able to take a parking space without worrying about it, to turn down a guy’s advances loudly and clearly, to eat her meal even if she forgot her fork and its a mess, to carry her own luggage, to get an annoying coworker to shut up… Being able to do all of this makes life much easier for the tomboy and those around her. Provided she knows when to use it and when not to.

As you have probably guessed from all the qualifiers, these tomboy traits have their pros and cons compared to the feminine alternative. In fact, they are actually best combined with more feminine traits. It’s better to be a woman who can relate to men, but still mother and nurture them, than to be a woman who is unreleable to men or who is harsh and masculine. It’s better to be a woman who looks after herself but is happy to get messy when it is vitally necessary, than to be a delicate doll or a scruffy, unwashed kid. However, and I hate to break this to you, but a lot of tomboys seem to naturally find that balance at some point before they hit 25. They learn to do just enough to please their partners, to get taken seriously at work and to have conversation with other women. Some may benefit from being a little more feminine, but there are far fewer tomboys without any feminine traits than there are feminine women without any tomboy traits.

And how does this balance actually work? Well, as mentioned, tomboys aren’t masculine. They’re often more a Farmer’s Wife and less a greasemonkey. Likewise, not all butch behaviours are tomboyish: some are just plain masculine. So this balance is found outside the masculine, but not quite into porcelain-doll-feminine. Expressed as a table, it would look something like this:

Soft Feminine. (Urban Wife.)

Rough Feminine. (Farmer’s Wife.)

Soft Masculine. (White Collar.)

Rough Masculine. (Blue Collar.)

Soft Feminine. (Urban Wife.)

Very feminine.

Mostly feminine.

Mostly feminine.

Sort of feminine.

Rough Feminine. (Farmer’s Wife.)

Mostly feminine.

Mostly of feminine.

Sort of feminine.

Sort of feminine.

Soft Masculine. (White Collar.)

Mostly feminine.

Sort of feminine.

Sort of feminine.

Not feminine.

Rough Masculine. (Blue Collar.)

Sort of feminine.

Sort of feminine.

Not feminine.

Not feminine.

Soft Feminine is dominant makeup, dress up, nurturing, pleasantness, very light activity and cleanliness. Stereotypical princess, kept wife, precious daughter, welfare queen.

Rough Feminine is dominant cleaning, washing, playing, mothering, harshness and straight-forwardness. Stereotypical farmer’s wife, professional athlete, working class woman, SAHM.

Soft Masculine is dominant professionalism, elegance, politeness, business, cleanliness and strength. Stereotypical secretary, accountant, programmer, lab tech.

Harsh Masculine is dominant manual labour, frankness, bluntness, strength, pride and honesty. Stereotypical lorry driver, manager, warehouse worker, working with animals.

Of course, there is some overlap of traits, but those are the positives generally found in that personality. Therefore, the girly tomboys lie in the green “Mostly Feminine”. If you seek to be feminine, these are actually the sort of girls you want to emulate. The “Very Feminine” soft girls may be more superficially feminine, but are less humanly feminine, less practical as people. In some situations being very feminine may help, but generally, if you plan on being feminine, it will lead you to hurdle after hurdle. The “Sort of Feminine” girls are the sort that pass as women, but are unrelateable to many other women and unattractive to most men. These are often immature tomboys or cliché tomboys. The “Not Feminine” girls are the only group that is actually properly butch.

There are advantages and disadvantages to each group, so of course it’s up to you which you wish to be. But if you wish to be feminine, confusingly, you actually reap more of the rewards of femininity if you add a touch of tomboy and try and keep in the green zones.

TTFN and Happy Hunting.

And you? What are your goals in terms of femininity? What do you expect to get out of them? Where would you put yourself on the scale?